Had you told me five years ago, heck, probably even two or three, that for my own sake I shouldn't run, I would have said "...'kay, great". I certainly would not have been let down, and I may not have been all that excited because I just didn't run. I was an elliptical gal through and through.
But then I started running because it takes less time (to an extent) and is cheaper than going to the gym. I wasn't phenomenal, but for the first time in my life I ran 4 miles at a time and my pace was less than ten minutes. I recall 5th or 6th grade Ellyn running a mile in 11:01. I learned the joys or actually running outside, running early in the morning, running in the cold (love), and running in the heat (for a reduced distance, usually). I started out with a plan, then abandoned it and didn't run nearly enough for about two months. In June, I got back on the wagon. After about a month I decided some direction was needed, so I consulted the training plan gods and started training for a 15k. On July 7th I set out on the first day on the plan. I pushed myself harder than usual because I was determined to follow through this time. About three minutes from the end of my run, something in my hip...sparked. I don't know how else to describe it. It wasn't a tear or a snap or a pop. I tried to run through it and then it spread to another spot on my hip. So I stopped. And limped home.
The next day I woke up and got ready for work as usual, but by the time I walked out of the alley I couldn't walk any further. I called into work and sat on the couch all morning willing my hip to heal. That evening I was to travel to Green Lake, WI, and had been looking forward to running in the wilderness. I optimistically packed two sets of running clothes just in case. They went unused.
In fact, I haven't run further than it takes to catch a bus or the pedestrian walk signal since then. I went to a bone doctor and even with x-rays he couldn't tell me what was wrong. Just that it didn't seem serious and physical therapy oughta do it. I went to a physical therapist, and she has no idea about the etiology. My progression has been disappointingly slow, though not non-existent. I just have to sit and wait and deal with it and not make it worse.
It sucks. I miss running. The mornings were cool this week and would have been the perfect running temperature. Mornings are nice because no one is out. And I never would have thought I'd say that, but it's true that running just makes you feel wonderful. I'm probably idealizing it, because I know there were days when it was hot and I was tired and the run overall was unimpressive. But I always felt good after. And I guess I was proud, because running accomplishments are measurable. I could say with certainty that I have improved by this much, and I did something today which I couldn't do last week. But now all the stuff I could do before, I can't do anymore.
What's really horrible, is that the injury isn't that bad. It doesn't hurt most of the time, and when it does it's not much. But it's there, just teasing me. I was almost a good runner, and now because of this tiny little strain I have to start all over. No 15k this fall. Goodbye, goals. I read Runner's World and running books and visit running stores; but please don't talk to me about the half-marathon you plan to run, or the great run you just had. Call me whiny, but it's unfair and I want to be fixed now, please.
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